This is my Virtual Battlefield Command Centre – from here we can control the entire activity of all of my armies with just a few mouse clicks.

Subscribe Today

• Subscribe to Armchair General Magazine
• Subscribe online and save nearly 40%!
 

(Chuckles) So I can see my Lord. I imagine you could have quite a party in here.

Just take a look at this General…

(The overhead view on the screen moves away from the battle scene to depict a military base complete with Helicopter landing pads and barracks)

With just a few clicks I can build some Tanks and whoosh…away they go!

Oh bravo your Magnificence, I’ve always liked this sort of thing.

You see General? Using this Centre, I can create armies instantaneously and send them into battle to win the day for me! I can view any part of the battlefield at a moment’s notice – ships, planes, tanks, men, all at my instant command!!

Absolutely Sir, the designers of this software really knew how to put a good game together – how many people can play on the network all at once?

(Looks askance at the General) Play? Well, we can cope with up to three hundred simultaneous users to coordinate our forces if that’s what you mean.

Wow, you must have one hell of a server – can people dial in remotely?

Of course not! This is my Command Centre!

(Laughs) Well yes Sir, of course it is, but I imagine you must have friends abroad who might want to play with you?

What the hell are you talking about? This is WAR man! I’d expect you to see a WAR when one is presented to you!

Oh indeed. Can it cope with FPS as well as RTS? Does it do TBS? What about TCP/IP – can it cope with PBEM?

Erm, I expect so, all of those protocols, if you want them, after all – it’s a state-of-the-art system General.

Cool. When you put your mind to something Sir, you really go for it!

Why didn’t you tell me this kind of thing was available? We could have built it months ago!

Well Sir, I kind of assumed we wouldn’t have time to be playing computer games, what with building a real Army and all that…

What are you blithering about? This thing DOES build an Army for you – didn’t you see the Tanks I just built? Seconds it took me to build them – SECONDS! And look, (screen flashes) I just got an upgrade, none of this R&D rubbish, I can upgrade my Army instantly! And there’s more…

More your Excellency?

Yes indeed. (the Doctor presses a few keys and an automated menu appears on the screen) Take a look at the options open to us, we don’t have to limit ourselves to conventional warfare, you see? There’s even an option for commencing Global Thermonuclear War!!

Yes my Lord, I just wish we could do this in real life…

General, I’m perplexed by your attitude – don’t you know a state-of-the-art Virtual Battlefield Command system when you see one?

Well, yes Sir, but I also know a copy of Command And Conquer: Generals when I see it.

(Long silence)

How did you know the name of the program? Have you got spies in my computer department?

Well, no Sir, but I have got a copy of it myself, I bought it when it came out. It’s a fantastic game.

(The penny drops)

This…is a GAME?

Oh yes Sir, and a very good one, fantastic choice. Can I have a go?

Help Armchair General by bookmarking to