It’s kind of a moot point now anyway, since you crashed the thing.

Subscribe Today

• Subscribe to Armchair General Magazine
• Subscribe online and save nearly 40%!
 

Me? But?

Never mind General, we all make mistakes, I won’t hold it against you. Are the cats OK?

(Peeks inside the plastic crate hanging from his neck, from which issues a loud hiss and growl) A little bit shell-shocked my Lord, but otherwise unharmed it seems. (Under his breath) More’s the pity. (Louder) I still say it was a mistake to let them out inside the cockpit.

They needed to stretch their legs, stop complaining.

But they clawed me half to death, and I was rather concentrating on trying to fly without any fuel.

Enough excuses General. (Sound of distant sirens) Anyway, we have more important things to worry about. Where are we exactly?

The GPS says we’re in San Antonio.

Damn, no doubt some small out of the way little hick village with limited contact with the outside world…

Actually, it’s the second most populated city in Texas. With the cash we made in Vegas, I’m sure we’ll be back on our feet in no time.

Oh, not so bad then. OK General, let’s get out of here, lead on!

* * *

(An hour later, the two figures trudge wearily along a dark, quiet street)

It’s like I said my Lord, Hotels don’t take bookings at this time of the day. And I’m not so sure we want to be showing our faces anyway, not with the Police crawling all over the city.

Well we need to find somewhere to sleep, right now I’ll settle for anything. (The two men come to a road junction) Like this iron gate for example. It’s well secured. Must be something interesting behind it. (The Doctor removes a finger from his robotic left hand and reveals a set of skeleton keys hidden inside) Hang on a minute, I’ll just spring the lock… (The gate opens) Come on, I’ve found us a place to stay, let’s go in…

(On the other side of the gate are some immaculately manicured gardens and flower beds. In the distance, rising from the gloom, an old stone building can be seen)

Oh my…

Come on General, we’ll hole up in that building for the night, this way…

But…

No buts, it might be a bit old, but it sure beats staying out in the open…

(Doctor Sinister heads off, followed by a protesting General…)

* * *

(Three hours later, General Menace stands staring out of an old stone window frame as the first fingers of sunlight creep across the wide Texas sky. Studying his GPS device for the tenth time, he gently exhales before heading back to the sleeping form of Doctor Sinister curled up in a ball in the corner of the room)

My Lord, your Excellency, you must wake up.

(Mumbling…still asleep) No Mother, I’m not doing anything naughty in here…honest…

Sagacity, I really must impress upon you the urgency of the situation, please wake up…

(Still mumbling, but now half asleep) No Father, I cannot tell a lie, it was not I who chopped down that cherry tree, it was someone else…

Oh for goodness sake. My Lord, the Police are outside!

(Awakes with a start) What?

Yes, we’re surrounded by the Police, they seem to be combing the city, they’re everywhere. They’re undoubtedly looking for us following the plane crash.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5

Help Armchair General by bookmarking to