Please help identifiying countryballs

[Bigode]

Countryballs are a series of jokes originated in a German forum, and have been used in historical humor. At

[I can't post links - please search for "countryballs europe map", thanks.]

we have a series of maps of Europe, by year, and I can't identify a lot of those. Plz hlp? Thank you very much, I'll try to list the ones I do know (omitting repetitions).

Also: I failed to find the forum rules - is it acceptable to cross-post in the Maps forum?

260 BC
- Celts, German(ic)s, Carthaginians, Romans, Greeks and Thracians wail on each other. Scythians raid people. And ... Hittites vs. Egyptians in West Asia?

0 CE
- Go Rome!
- The Germanic area Rome never conquered is actually much larger than it suggests (Praise be to Arminius!).
- Basques? I wasn't aware of them being independent by that time.
- What I assume is Iran would actually have been much larger (seems that at their respective peaks, Iran was (a little) larger than Rome, and it was large for quite a long time.

450 CE
- Huns whip German(ic)s, German(ic)s kill Rome and rule pretty much of Europe.
- Byzantines endure, and Greeks call themselves "Romans".
- Is a proto-Romanian people implied to be asleep? I don't quite know what was up there by that time. Also, I'm not sure which "Asian" people is next to the Huns.

731 CE
- Why do the Germanic hordes have those colors?
- Umayyads stare down Byzantines and Franks at once (!).
- Denmark and Sweden are already recognizable. And I know the Finnic tribes occupied quite a bit of territory, but I thought most of it was already under Swedish or Rus rule.
- Khazaria and Papal States exist.

1099 CE
- Castille, Aragon and Galicia at odds.
- England holds Brittany. Scotland exists.
- Holy Roman Empire and Kievan Rus stand tall, with Poland and Hungary (Not to be trifled with!) between them.
- Seljuks stab Byzantines and Templars.

1300 CE
- An unified, independent Ireland?
- Lithuania and Bohemia go!
- Sword Knights hold Baltic territory.
- OMGMONGOLS

1500 CE
- Yes, Lithuania's larger than Poland ...
- Crimean Tatars helping Ottomans.
- An already defined Switzerland?

1600 CE
- Spain: would be the largest extant empire (and surpassed, up to that date, only by Mongolia) even if it didn't include Portugal. And it does.
- Nevertheless, the Dutch Republic is born.
- The Holy Roman Empire still exists, but Austria (that took (most of) Hungary back from the Ottomans) does its own thing (that involves being pissed at the Ottomans, with reason).
- Poland-Lithuania is born.

1707 CE
- Portugal goes back to being a country.
- Why is Prussia wearing what looks like a priestly hat?
- Finally, the Russian flag I know appears. But what did the flag changes mean?
- Barbary piracy!
- UK takes Gibraltar.

1811 on
- Most flags are repeats, or ones used nowadays, or ones I don't recognize.

[Cosmos]

Welcome to ACG.

There are some restrictions for new members but you'll be able to post images when you reach 5 posts.

If you would like to introduce yourself in the Introductions section you will probably find it easy to reach 5 posts.

[Duke Maynard]

Picture in question, if I'm not mistaken:

[Duke Maynard]

Originally Posted by Bigode

260 BC
- Celts, German(ic)s, Carthaginians, Romans, Greeks and Thracians wail on each other. Scythians raid people. And ... Hittites vs. Egyptians in West Asia?

Ought to be Seleucids round then, I believe, not Hittites, who were a bronze age civilization.

0 CE
- Go Rome!
- The Germanic area Rome never conquered is actually much larger than it suggests (Praise be to Arminius!).
- Basques? I wasn't aware of them being independent by that time.
- What I assume is Iran would actually have been much larger (seems that at their respective peaks, Iran was (a little) larger than Rome, and it was large for quite a long time.

Well, I wouldn't so much use the word praise for dirty filthy traitors, but I digress. As for the Iberian peninsula, I'm not sure why there's an independent ball there, but the locals where perpetually rowdy and continuously revolting or guerrilla fighting.

450 CE
- Huns whip German(ic)s, German(ic)s kill Rome and rule pretty much of Europe.
- Byzantines endure, and Greeks call themselves "Romans".
- Is a proto-Romanian people implied to be asleep? I don't quite know what was up there by that time. Also, I'm not sure which "Asian" people is next to the Huns.

I think that's Armenia underneath the huns; Romania looks like it is sleeping.

731 CE
- Why do the Germanic hordes have those colors?
- Umayyads stare down Byzantines and Franks at once (!).
- Denmark and Sweden are already recognizable. And I know the Finnic tribes occupied quite a bit of territory, but I thought most of it was already under Swedish or Rus rule.
- Khazaria and Papal States exist.

The areas that were german have the Romanian colors- I don't think the spread of the gypsies happened this early? I'm quite confused as well.

1300 CE
- An unified, independent Ireland?
- Lithuania and Bohemia go!
- Sword Knights hold Baltic territory.
- OMGMONGOLS

It seems there is a little baby England ball on Ireland as well, foreshadowing.

1707 CE
- Portugal goes back to being a country.
- Why is Prussia wearing what looks like a priestly hat?
- Finally, the Russian flag I know appears. But what did the flag changes mean?
- Barbary piracy!
- UK takes Gibraltar.

Prussia is wearing a mitre cap, which is as you say the headgear of priests. However, Mitre caps were also the headgear of choice for 18th century elite grenadiers. The prussian grenadier is very much a symbol of the military might and brilliance under Frederick the Great. Perhaps it's not as perfect a symbol in 1707, but the next frame jumps another 100 years and skips Freddy II.

[Imperial]

Originally Posted by Duke Maynard

The areas that were german have the Romanian colors- I don't think the spread of the gypsies happened this early? I'm quite confused as well.

I hope none of your remaining neurons were killed by you trying to pass off as slick and funny.

[Duke Maynard]

Originally Posted by Imperial

I hope none of your remaining neurons were killed by you trying to pass off as slick and funny.

Well, something just set off a nerve. Is that really a way to correct a misconception?

[Imperial]

Originally Posted by Duke Maynard

Well, something just set off a nerve. Is that really a way to correct a misconception?

No need to feign confusion and naivete Duke. You knew exactly what kind of "slick" potshot you were taking at my country. You associated the Romanian colors with the "spread of the gypsies". There's no point in me trying to give you some history cliffsnotes or "correct" anything because your intention is plain and was answered in kind. And no, answering in kind is not something "gypsyish" if that's what you're implying.

p.s. And I don't even see Romanian colors all over the map in 731 AD.

[Duke Maynard]

Originally Posted by Imperial

No need to feign confusion and naivete Duke.

Attempting to offend various eastern European ethnic groups/nationalists as much as possible has, of course, always been a character trait of mine. Except not. I didn't even know that that would have even been considered a potshot in the 21st century.

And no, there are no Romanian flag colors on the map in 731 AD. In the OP it was mentioned that the proto-Romanian ball, as he called it, was lying asleep (on the Black Sea coast too, mind you). Next frame, the ball that was asleep now covers all of central Europe. Looking at it now that's it brought to my attention I see it's not actually the Romanian flag but I was thinking in terms of the sleeping 'proto-romanian ball' and mentally went on cruise control.

And if I'm making the honest mistake of not even properly recognizing the flag what does that say about any 'slick potshots' you thought I made? There was a good quote that we shared here in discussing the squalor of the second Boer War's concentration camps- "never ascribe to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." Believe what you want to believe but I'm perfectly innocent of any 'potshots'.

[Rale]

The blue white and red ball's are Slavs